After months and months of teasing, Cardi B finally released her debut album Invasion of Privacy on Friday, and as expected, it’s perfect. It’s also full of lyrics that you would put in your AIM away message if AIM still existed, so in the spirit of making your crush wonder exactly who you’re pissed at today, please enjoy this list of the most badass lines on the album. (Not including “Bodak Yellow, “Bartier Cardi,” and “Be Careful” because those have been out for a while.)
1. Look myself in the mirror, I say we gon’ win / Knock me down nine times, but I get up ten. (“Get Up 10”)
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2. He can tell from the front I got ass behind me / And I park my Bentley truck on my Versace driveway. (“Money Bag”)
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3. I gotta work on my anger, might kill a bitch with my fingers / I gotta stay outta Gucci, I’m finna to run out of hangers. (“Drip”)
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4. I could buy designer, but this Fashion Nova fit all that ass. (“She Bad”)
5. I need Chrissy Teigen / Know a bad bitch when I see one / Tell RiRi I need a threesome. (“She Bad”)
6. I don’t hang with these bitches ’cause these bitches be corny / And I got enough bras, y’all ain’t gotta support me. (“Get Up 10”)
I run this shit like cardio.
7. Is she a stripper, a rapper, a singer? / I’m busting blocks in a Bentley Bentayga / Ride through your hood like “Bitch, I’m the mayor!” (“Drip”)
8. I’ve been that bitch since pajamas with footies / Won MVP, and I’m still a rookie. (“Drip”)
9. I like million-dollar deals / Where’s my pen, bitch I’m signin’ / I like those Balenciagas / The ones that look like socks / I like going to the jeweler / I put rocks all in my watch. (“I Like It”)
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10. Told that bitch I’m sorry, though, ’bout my coins like Mario / Yeah they call me Cardi B I run this shit like cardio. (“I Like It”)
11. I do the Maybach on Monday, Ferrari Friday / This is sweet pussy Saturday, that’s just what Plies say / I said “Bae, it’s a snack,” he said it’s a entrée / With them pretty-ass twins, you look like Beyoncé. (“Money Bag”)
12. Chef Cardi B, I’m cookin’ up / I see you hos at the stove again / While you hos were sleepin’ on me, I made 40 bands by 4 p.m. (“Money Bag”)
At the iHeartRadio Music Awards in March.Getty ImagesAdvertisement – Continue Reading Below
13. Pussy so good, I say my own name during sex. (“I Do”)
14. I wear Off White at church / Prolly make the preacher sweat / Read the Bible, Jesus wept / Bitch say that she gon’ try me / How come I ain’t seen it yet? (“She Bad”)
15. I just want to break up all your shit / Call your mama phone, let her know that she raised a bitch / Then dial tone, click. (“Thru Your Phone”)
16. I cannot stand you, right hand to Jesus / I might just cut all the tongues out your sneakers / Smash your TV from Best Buy / You gon’ turn me into into Left Eye. (“Thru Your Phone”)
At the Marc Jacobs show in February.Getty Images
17. They gave a bitch two options, strippin’ or lose / Used to dance in a club right across from my school / I said “dance” not “fuck,” don’t get it confused / Had to set the record straight ’cause bitches love to assume. (“Get Up 10”)
18. I walked into the label, “Where the check at?” / Cardi B on the charts, ain’t expect that / Where that bitch that was claimin’ she a threat? / I’ma put a Louboutin where her neck at. (“Get Up 10”)
19. Ain’t no more beefing, I’m just keeping to myself / I’m my own competition, I’m competing with myself. (“Best Life”)
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20. Get money go hard / Motherfuckin’ right / Never been a fraud in my motherfuckin’ life. (“Get Up 10”)
21. Went from small-ass apartments to walking red carpets / Pissy elevators, now every dress is tailored / This some real-life fairy tale Binderella shit / I got further than them hos said I will ever get. (“Best Life”)
22. I took pictures with Beyoncé, I met Mama Knowles / I’m the rose that came from the concrete in the Rolls / I’m like gold, I’m like goals, man, I chose and I’m floating. (“Best Life”)